Setting The Scene
It is morning, the house is quiet. Two cups of coffee sit steaming on the table. I’m the only one in the room, but sit down excited to be sharing the company of my unseen guest. Just for the time it takes to finish a cup of coffee or two, my attention is going to be focused and uninterrupted on these moments that I get to sit down with my best friend. This has become one of my most favorite parts of my day... No phone, no computer, no distractions... only coffee. Excitement builds as I took my seat, across from Jesus.
The first of these experiences may have went something like this...
ME:
I’ve often wondered what I would say in a situation such as this...
JESUS:
And now that you have it?
ME:
I have absolutely no idea what to say.
JESUS:
smiles
That might actually be a good place to start. (i.e. no need to say anything)
ME:
The comment went right over my head
I guess I thought if I could actually sit with You like this, I’d have questions. Deep ones. Theology. Heaven. Questions that know one knows the answers to. Why certain things happened. But sitting here now… I really just want to know something much different
JESUS:
Ask Me anything.
ME:
Are You pleased with me?
Jesus doesn’t answer immediately.
ME:
Your pause makes me nervous.
JESUS:
Why?
ME:
I don’t know! A lack of confidence maybe?
I know how many times that I’ve failed. I know the many things that I should have done differently. And lately I’ve been trying so hard to get closer to You. To hear You. To serve You. To be useful to You... I don’t want to waste my life. I don’t want to disappoint You.
JESUS:
Let's start here... you just told Me everything you’re doing, but you haven’t told Me why you’re doing it.
ME:
Because I love You and I want you to be pleased with me.
JESUS:
But I am already aware of all the things.
ME:
And because I want You to love me also, I want this more than anything.
Jesus looks at me.
JESUS:
Ahh. There it is.
ME:
I don't understand?
JESUS:
The thing underneath all the other things.
ME:
What do You mean?
JESUS:
You’ve been trying to earn something I already gave you.
Silence.
ME:
I know the what scripture says.
JESUS:
I didn’t ask whether you knew the verses. Do you believe them?
ME:
I’m trying.
JESUS:
You’re trying very hard.
ME:
Is that bad?
JESUS:
Serving Me is admirable. Obeying Me makes me happy. Wanting more of Me pleases me also.
But you can become so busy trying to prove that you’re a faithful servant that you forget you’re also a beloved son.
ME:
I just want You to use me.
JESUS:
And I just want a relationship with you.
ME:
…
JESUS:
Those aren’t the same thing.
I look down at my coffee.
ME:
I don’t really know how to just sit with You. What do we do?
I always feel like I should be praying about somebody. Studying something. Fixing something. Fighting something. Doing something.
JESUS:
I noticed. And I love your servants heart. But everything that your trying to do should come from an overflow of how you feel and what you know about me
ME:
Okay.
We sit quietly for a moment.
ME:
So what am I supposed to do right now?
JESUS:
Nothing.
ME:
Nothing?
JESUS:
You’re sitting with Me. Why does that feel like nothing?
That one lands.
ME:
Because I’m used to measuring whether I’m doing the right thing or doing enough.
JESUS:
I know.
ME:
Then, can you teach me how to stop?
JESUS:
Abide in Me.
ME:
Somehow, I knew You were going to say that.
JESUS:
Then perhaps you should stop looking for a different answer.
ME:
smiles
That's fair.
JESUS:
You keep thinking intimacy with Me is somewhere ahead of you.
One more breakthrough.
One more encounter.
One more answered prayer.
One more moment when you finally hear Me clearly enough.
But Devin… I am here, already. And always have been.
Silence.
JESUS:
You don’t have to perform for Me this morning.
You don’t have to impress Me.
You don’t have to convince Me that you’re serious.
I know your heart.
Just enjoy these moments together.
ME:
That’s it?
JESUS:
For this cup of coffee? Yes.
Tomorrow we’ll talk about some of the things holding you back.
ME:
What things?
JESUS:
You know.
ME:
….
JESUS:
If you'll give me the time, I'd love to continue this tomorrow.
ME:
Absolutely, how could I not!
And for once, I don’t get up. I don’t reach for my Bible.
I don’t make a list. I don’t ask Him for anything.
I just sit there, the coffee getting cold.
The morning was quiet. The new day had begun, but even with everything my mind felt committed to accomplishing, I was content just being there, still, in the quiet, with Jesus.
And somehow… that is enough.
This scenario is exaggerated some to be able to share the practice. If you’ve never had coffee with Jesus, I’d highly recommend it. At least once per week.
Literally go through the motions, like you were meeting a friend at a private table in a coffee shop. Have the conversations. Ask the questions and make the comments, and allow quiet time for response. Jesus truly is present, you just have to be able to acknowledge and recognize Him.
This is a simple exercise that can pay great dividend for those who’s prayer life may seem to be a one way street.
Have expectation. If if nothing transpires the first time or two that you do this. Be persistent and keep coming with expectation. Eventually, you might find that this becomes one of your most cherished times of your day or week.
Let me know how it goes!!
~Devin
Devin Osborne
The Early Church
